Imposter Syndrome

Many people struggle with internalizing their successes. We attribute the success to external factors, say that “it was given to me” rather than it was earned, or claim that there is more that could’ve been done to justify responsibility. Via this reasoning, achievements are made to feel less satisfying.

Origins of Imposter Syndrome

This internal conflict happens because the mind has multiple producers of thoughts that operate of their own accord. On particular days, some thoughts arise more than the other.

Imposter syndrome refers to the overthinking that takes place during the days where a “I should be…” thought producer is producing more than the “I am happy being…” one. That is why people that suffer from imposter syndrome think that they are “behind the curve”, “not good enough”, or “not deserving of success”.

There are times where people have a low sense of worth and they will use external things that elevate their sense of worth. If they feel that they are not good enough, then this idea will not go away until they will use an external things that make them feel good enough.

For example, lets analyze what happens when someone with imposter syndrome is paid a compliment.

One thought producer generates a thought appreciating the compliment. At the same time, another thought machine produces a thought that says that the compliment was a lie. This is accompanied by a feeling of shame.

As a result of these two opposing thoughts, both thoughts either nullify each other or one overwhelms the other. If the “I’m ugly” thought producer is overactive, then a compliment that was suppose to brighten your day turns into something that ruins your day.

Some questions to ask yourself to diagnose these thought producers:

Is there a false or true identity?
Is there a comparison/judgement being made on the differences?
Where do you get your true identity?
Is there a sense of deserving more?
Is there a sense of deserving less?

To feel like a fraud/imposter, you need to believe that you are not who you are, and these beliefs need to come from somewhere. The origin of these beliefs can “set the bar” and create judgements respective to the “bar,” positive or negative.

Effect of Imposter Syndrome

Imposter syndrome robs you of the satisfaction of living and being who you want to be. It can also lead you to a path where you constantly feel “not good enough”. Moreover, you might end up chasing a path that does not make you happy for who you are. The feeling that you are not good enough becomes a norm and stops hurting because it is now a fact to your mind.

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

Discover the source of the thought machine
You might find yourself fighting your mind and imposing positive thoughts to stop the negative thoughts. However, the most important thing is to acknowledge the difference between who you are and the idea of what you should be. Also acknowledge that you place a value judgement on wanting to be one thing over what you should be.
When you notice these negative thoughts, recognize where they come from and understand that you don’t have to believe them. Thoughts are just thoughts. Let go of your judgement of not being good enough, so that you can be who you are.
Also recognize that there is another part of you that just wants to be who you are. Listen to these thoughts. The more you listen, the less the other thoughts can influence on you.

Figuring Out Who You Are

Figuring out what you want to be does not stop the feeling of inadequacy.
If you do not want to fit in, use that feeling as an indicator of what you should be. Explore why you feel conflicted with being something which you are not. As a result, you will find/define who you are.

Encouraging Positive Thought Machines

The first step is to notice which thought machine is on. This is difficult, because thoughts can feel like facts.
Find the origin of the thought machine and recognize when these thoughts occur throughout your everyday life. See if it compares to the feeling from the past.
After acknowledging these thoughts, know that you can act outside of its influence and listen to the other thought machines you want to listen to.

How to deal with Impostor Syndrome ft. Maya